With Feelings

It’s funny how it begins,
Submissively at first,
Turning perversely willful,
These traitorous feelings.

Planting seeds of daisies,
Sunflowers and happy things,
Suddenly taking centerstage,
Deceitful to my brain.

But, with the change in moon,
The readings of the tarot,
Or perhaps, someone very confused,
I am back here – to begin again.

I close my eyes,
And think of a place,
Think of a time,
Think of a day.

On some floor on the stairs,
While the Eiffel glittered.
On that little edge,
Overlooking the whole of Hallstatt.

In the rush of the coaster,
That water slide and the jump.
Or in that moment,
In daze at Disneyland.

Sitting in the lavender fields,
Or the first look at my fresh peonies,
I close my eyes,
and slowly smile.

April 7, 2019

The Eiffel

Like a familiar rush,
That of a first date,
A little nervous, mixed with anxious,
And little butterflies giddy with excitement.
Simmering hope,
And jitters of ‘this could be it’,
Shaking legs and beating heart,
She walks toward the gate.

She had known it from before –
The feelings that it strikes,
Had read about in books,
Had watched it movies all her life.
In the city of love,
With bridges and cathedrals,
Sitting next to a vintage carousel,
The Eiffel stood out.

No realistic expectations,
She had dreamt it too much-
A little rosé and cold medicine,
Newly, out of words.
It had been a long road,
There had been prayers,
Lost loves, some tears,
And a happy, hopeful girl.

A long sigh,
Under the glittering lights,
It was the Eiffel,
Beckoning her home.

February 1, 2019